Yes I’m attracted to men and women. No I am not bisexual.

As a proud “Directioner” I have definitely been keeping up with the rumours and suspicions about Harry Styles’ sexuality. Recently in an interview with he and Liam Payne, Harry casually revealed that gender is “not that important” in a relationship, causing bisexual accusations to fly out. Harry has always remained so gender neutral in conversations regarding relationships and love, something I also try to do. Harry has never formally “come out” as bisexual, or has he ever addressed his sexuality publicly. And why should he?

It has always really aggravated me that people expect other people to make a public announcement regarding their sexuality. This occurs all the way from the large scale of a celebrity to a high school student who feels pressure to make a Facebook status about their same sex preferences. No one expects a person who identifies as heterosexual to make a PSA about their urges and desires, but they sure do expect them to call no homo if they may have perhaps done something that could be considered homosexual. How offensive to feel the need to make aware that the action you’re partaking in is not to be taken as homosexual. I’ve never seen someone identifying as homosexual make clear of no hetero. Why can a person not just start dating someone of the same sex and have people be okay with it?

Another facet of my aggravation stems from labels. Why does society feel it necessary to categorize people as gay, or straight, or bisexual? Not only has society created these labels, but someone decided that making a group to celebrate any sexuality that isn’t straight would be a good idea. It seems that it’s okay to have pride in sexual preferences associated with the LGBT community, which by all means it is. The community has fantastic ideals; I agree whole-heartedly  that love is love and that all love should be accepted. I do, however, think the community is isolating and a slap in the face to those who identify as heterosexual. If love is love, then why is there not a part of the community that recognizes the straight people of this world?

My personal experience with the struggles that come with the LGBT community began in 12th grade.I had dated a few guys throughout my high school career, never experiencing question or judgement. I began seeing a girl in January of senior year, and of course, in typical high school fashion, it seemed everyone knew the next morning. I had to field so many unexpected questions from people i was close to and also from people i was not so close to. It always began with, “so are you, like, bi now?” to which I would always answer no. Immediately following they would ask very carefully, “are you a lesbian then?” to which i would also reply no. I was then face to face with a very confused person that, without fail, always finished up the questions by asking, “so what are you then?” I would always answer in a similar fashion, “I am still me. I was me dating a guy and now I’m me dating a girl. I don’t need a label to tell me who I am.” I learned very quickly that I didn’t need a label to understand myself. Other people labeled me because they couldn’t understand how I felt. Giving a label that has a definition helps them to comprehend something that they otherwise never could.

Some people would place me as a member of the LGBT community, but I don’t. I’m not bisexual. I’m not gay. I’m not straight. I’m just me, and I’m always going to be me no matter who I’m attracted to or who I date or who I love. If i were to identify with any sort of label, it would happily be gender neutrality. Who you love is not important but who you are is. If you want to experiment in college with same sex relationships, do it. You can never understand someone until you take the time to go to a place where you can understand them. Kiss who you’re attracted to, love who you love, be who you are and be proud.

Advertisements